Memories

"When someone you love becomes a memory,

that memory becomes a gift."

I think I have spent most of my quiet moments this past week recalling every memory I have of my grandpa and replaying them over and over in my mind. It's almost as if I feel a sense of panic, like I just might forget one of them if I allow myself to stop thinking about it. Perhaps by writing a few of them down, I can rest at ease a little. So here are a few of my favorite memories/stories about my grandpa.

* Grandpa was notorious for being an overly cautious driver. Sometimes he even stopped for green lights. It wasn't uncommon for an impatient driver to honk and wave a certain finger in the air. Grandpa's reaction was always the same. He would turn to them, smile and wave hello.

* Grandpa was such optimist. He was SO positive. In the last few years he has had to see numerous doctors for numerous ailments. When a doctor would walk into the room the interaction was always the same. The doctor would ask "So, how are we doing today?" And grandpa's reply was always the same. "I am just great. How are you?" He would then want to hear all about the doctor and how things were going for him. My mom or grandma would have to remind him that they were at the doctor because HE WAS sick. One of his doctors used to say "Ray, you are the HEALTHIEST, unhealthy person I know."

* My grandpa had a love of music. He played the saxophone and even had his own band. My brother said it best when he said, "He is the only old person I know that you would have to ask to turn the volume down while listening to his music."

* He loved American Idol! We had so much fun talking about all the contestants. We were both Clay Aiken fans and Troy and I, my parents AND grandma and grandpa actually went to the American Idol tour concert when it came to Salt Lake. We laughed as we sat among thousands of teenagers but we still had a blast.

* He loved to work out. Up until about a week before he passed away he would still go the gym to lift weights with some of his friends. I think we were all a little nervous to think of our frail 125 pound grandpa going to the gym but no one could tell him otherwise. Two days before died he said, "If I could just get to the gym, I think I would feel a lot better."

* Whenever we went out to eat at a restaurant his favorite treat was to drink the little containers of coffee creamer out on the tables. He would sip it, swallow and then say "Ah, ta-ta-ta-TA." At his graveside we tied creamers to balloons and had all the grandkids and great-grandkids send creamers to heaven for grandpa. We also passed out creamers at the luncheon and had one last toast to grandpa.

* He had lots of funny sayings. Some of my favorite are:

"Why get mad, you just have to get glad again."

"What are you birds up to?"

"This is right up there with a good nose bleed."

* He never wanted to miss out on a party and loved social events. He wanted to be involved with everything and probably pushed his aging body farther than he should. If there was a golf game, he was going. In 2002 the entire Larsen clan went to Hawaii. I will never forget my grandpa boogie boarding in the ocean just so he didn't miss out on the fun. I think we were all a little fearful watching the waves throw him around but no one could convince him to sit it out.

* Every time he saw one of his grandkids or great-grandkids he would pull out his little coin purse and give you some money. It wasn't much but it was something. I swear always kept his coin purse full just in case someone stopped by.

And then there are those precious memories in the final hours of his life. Like how even though he was so weak he still wanted to hold Caymbree. He pressed his forehead right against hers and just held her. Caymbree who usually would squirm and squeal just sat quietly as they had their little moment. I remember how he grabbed Hallee's hand and gave it a tight squeeze. And how, as we were about to leave, he looked at Hope and said, "One call...that's all." Hope laughed and then did it back to him. And finally, how in our final embrace he made sure to tell me just how much he loved me.

Thanks for the memories grandpa!